Just me

Here I am again. The sad Sir Benjamin sitting alone on Friday night with nothing to do. I don’t know what happened. A few months ago I had so many options, I had to pick and choose what I was going to do on a Friday night. That was before everyone started “dating.” I swear to God, everyone I know is “dating” someone. What was wrong with the way things were before? I liked it better when we all used to hang out together and everyone was friends with everyone. We used to have so much fun. It seemed like there were always 20 of us hangin’ out together. Now I’m stuck at home with my family on a Friday night. How lame is that. Everyone else is out on a date with their girlfriend or on a “couples date”. I have no interest in having a girlfriend. I have so much other stuff I’m doing, I feel like I’d have to give it all up if I had a girlfriend. I’d rather be alone. I mean maybe someday, but not now. I thought about getting one, a girlfriend I mean, because everyone else has one. But whenever I put on the moves I make a fool out of myself. I end up feeling like an idiot.
I’m starting to feel like I can’t relate to anyone anymore. Whenever I’m with the guys at school or in the locker room, they’re always talking about what they did with their girlfriend. Well, that or sex. I totally can’t relate to that. I’ve never had sex so I just sort of shut up when the subject comes up. Plus….well… my parents always taught me that it’s not right to have sex until you’re married. I can imagine how well that would go over with the guys if I ever actually brought that up. Am I the only one who thinks that? I’ll tell you one thing. Since everyone started having sex, I don’t seem to have many friends anymore. Like that became more important than friends.
What sucks the most is that I am just a few months from my Senior year of High School and I feel like it’s going to be the worst of my High School years. I can’t stand the thought of this being what my Senior year is going to be like, sitting at home all the time. Maybe I should try harder with the girls. Do girls want sex? Maybe if I had sex, I wouldn’t be alone all the time.
I don’t know…..I just want things back to the way they used to be.